to blog or not to blog

Or maybe a more appropriate title would be, "my annual blog breakdown".  JK.  I guess about every year or so I just reevaluate what this is to me.  (this blog and blogging in my life in general)

(evidentially I'm a rockstar)

I love being able to share my creativity with others.  I've also found that I'm able to be more creative than I thought I could be through having a blog.  Anywhere from having parties, to doing photo shoots or crafts... I'm not sure I would've done some of those things if it weren't for blogs!  Not that I'm a lame person usually but I see ideas, and I'm inspired.  So...that, AND, it's just fun to share things.  So I do more things just so I can share them.  Make sense?  My husband and I have even had this talk... that thanks to my blog I've been inspired to do more with my life- and kids.  We both think it's a great thing.  Not to mention, if it weren't for my blog and my desire to share nice pictures on it, I would've never started my business!  What a great thing.
Another great thing is all the friendships I've made because of it.  I've met some girls- started blog friendships- and those are now real life friendships that I genuinely cherish.

Even with all those positives sometimes the negatives weigh heavily on me.  So heavily in fact that I struggle with whether or not I should blog at all.  Last year my concern was keeping my life (kids) safe.  That's all taken care of.  I don't worry about that so much anymore as I worry about preconceived opinions of me.  (I'm a delicate flower, you know.)  Allow me to sp'lain

Having a blog is sometimes like having a nightmare where you are stark naked in public and can't cover up.  I know that when I put my ideas and opinions out there people may disagree or look at it like a hot mess.  It's gotta happen, everyone is different.  Part of me really wants to prevent that from happening.  As in, I'd like to have people get to know me rather than read about me and then think they know me.  Sometimes I'm sarcastic- what if you can't tell?  Unfortunately, some people wouldn't know sarcasm if it slapped them in the face like a cold piece of raw chicken breast..that was it, btw;)  This isn't like a new epiphany I've had, I've felt this way pretty much since blogging day 1.  Couple times in AZ some people I just met would mention that they read my blog.  So it got me wondering what they already thought of me.  Or what they already "knew".

The bottom line about it though?  What I've come to decide (right now anyway) is that even though that isn't the way I'd like to have it- having a blog is still something I like to do.  And this is me so take it or leave it (;

*and since you're here, that means you love me so please with sprinkles, gumdrops, and rainbows  and stuff validate me go vote!  And for my friend!  I'm falling behind in the rankings (momma nooooo!)   And... if you don't, well, "dishonor on you and your cow"  ah hahaha.